Carol, myself, and our family have received an amazing amount of love lately. We are deeply humbled, not only by our church body, but by our friends, neighbors, doctors, and nurses. Even strangers have been led to us to say just the right words at just the right time. And even more importantly, people who have so graciously listened as I have told one “Christina story” after another. These patient people seem to welcome the many stories that just won’t stop. I praise God for the people with the gift of listening, as the telling of these stories have been so helpful throughout this very painful journey. This serves as a continual reminder of God’s love for us during a time when words are simply inadequate to describe the feeling of loss. Yes, each day for the rest of our lives, we will be aware of Christina’s absence. Our family will always be aware of the physical loss. That is the inevitable truth — the reality that death creates. You simply cannot remove the physical presence of a person like Christina from your life without an earthly sense of deep, deep sorrow. In actuality, I have a hard time writing that word, “loss,” as we really do not feel that we have lost her. Ever since that day in the delivery room when Christina was placed into mine and Carols arms, as is with each of our four children, we have experienced a miracle. I have viewed each day of our children’s lives as miraculous and otherworldly. This miracle of life truly is a gift, and it’s a gift that should never be squandered or wasted.
This morning I awoke with a deep sense of gratitude to God for the gift of time and special moments with our children. These moments will always fill Carol’s and my lifetime (however long or short that may be) with recollections of laughter, inspiration, bittersweetness, happiness, and even sadness. These moments allow us to still experience the presence of our children whether they are just out of sight or have moved on to heaven. In the end, they are all moments that God has given us to deepen our relationship with him and hopefully bless those that we encounter each day as we learn to look to him for ALL things. Many thanks to each of you that have shared this path that we walked along. In so doing, you have been God’s hands and feet to carry out his promise of this not being “more than we can bear.”
Beware, I will always have more stories to share about Christina, and her amazing creator whom she is now with.
We are here on earth for a purpose and our time here is short. Don’t waste it.
“Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be.
Remind me that my days are numbered—
how fleeting my life is.”